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Why my first marriage crashed – Shan George
Nollywood screen goddess and member of ‘Nollywood Single Mothers Club’ Shan George believes that after two failed marriages, she would again find her ideal man and live with happily ever after.
In a recent chat, the A-list thespian recounts how a near-tragic experience that almost turned her to a cripple turned around her life. She also opened up on how her first marriage crashed plush other interesting thing about her career.
I am working on my new movie entitled Finding Good Luck which would be premiered on May 25, 2012.
What is this movie about?
It is a story that has to do with the kind of crimes that are being perpetuated here in Nigeria; crimes that used to be strange and unheard of in Nigeria, among which are kidnapping, assassination and blackmail. The movie also reveals how Nigerian politicians are directly or indirectly involved in this heinous crimes and how the police is trying to tackle them.
The movie germinated during a period when I was bedridden for a couple of months, when I thought I wouldn’t walk again. I began to think about what I was going to be doing to make a living. After two months on the hospital bed – from one hospital to another – I went through the normal Ijaw [bone] massage [therapy] and then churches, prayers and all that, I still could not walk. That was when I took up the script which I had in my laptop for some months and I started tidying it up, with the hope that I was going to sell it to make a living. So I made a good effort to ensure that the script came out as best as possible so that somebody would be able to bring out good money to buy it. Fortunately, by the time I finished tidying up the script, I was getting much better and had started walking. When I got out of the hospital, I thought I had to shoot this movie myself because it was just too good. That is how Finding Good luck came about.
The title: Finding Good Luck
(Laughter) The major character in the movie, who happens to be a young boy, his name is Goodluck. It has nothing to do with our president. There was a search for the boy, hence the title “Finding Goodluck”. When I wanted to do the script, the first thing that came to my mind was to go home and do the film, that is in Calabar, so that I can give opportunity to my people and use it as a springboard to showcase their talents. I also have known names in the movie too. I am premiering it on May 26 in Lagos. It is strictly by invitation; after then, it will hit the cinemas. I have actually been to the US, for a promotional tour, which started on March 4 and ended on March 9. We went to cities such as New York, Washington DC, California, North Carolina.
My major challenge was funding. It was a huge challenge because I wrote the script with the intention to sell it, not to shoot it. The Commissioner of Police, Cross River State, actually helped a lot; he went an extra mile in supporting me. I don’t know how I would have done it without him because it was not always about cash, there were other things needed and he gave them to me – police uniforms, guns, vans – these are things that if I did not have Commisoner Wuda supporting me, I could have needed more money to do all that. I did not shoot the film like a typical Nigerian film. It is not a film that is going to be shown only on Afircan Magic, it can be shown also on channels that show Hollywood movies.
I was bedridden
That is because it is not everything you would want to tell the press. It is easy to talk about it now because I am fine now, but back then on the hospital bed I wasn’t in the mood to throw a pity party. I was rather trying to calm down to adjust to being a cripple if it were to result to that. I fell in my bath tub and I hit my back on the edge and passed out, by the time I woke up, I discovered I was not able to walk. I really want to say thank you to people like Daddy Showkey, and others who really stood by me during that trying period.
I wouldn’t want to be called a musician, probably a singer. I sing, but being a musician is a lot more than just singing. I don’t play any instrument. I have been singing for many years, now I have done three albums, the last one I recorded is titled dance, and I am still hoping to do more. I do this music thing when I am free, when I am not acting, producing or writing. So music is secondary to me.
My son going into music
No, I didn’t. He chose it himself. He is studying music in the University of East London, and this song of his you have heard is nothing official, it is just his normal school work, which he uploaded online and people loved it.
If people want to talk about me, they should go ahead and talk, I don’t give a Jack about it. If my relationship with my God is great, then why should I care about what mere people have to say? So I don’t have time. I use my time in writing my films, shooting or going to the studio for my songs.
I wouldn’t. The truth of the matter is that when you are given out for marrige, at a very young age, there is a lot of psycohological damage it does to you. First of all, you are so immature, and immaturity as we know causes a lot of lapses in anything we do, either your job, your school or in your relationship with the opposite sex, like in marriage. Immaturity goes a long way to do a lot of damage because your reasoning is feeble, and when your reasoning is feeble, your actions will be feeble. I don’t think I will advise anybody to get married at a tender age as I did.
Why my first marriage failed
Do you know how old my first son is? I have two sons from this marriage you are talking about, a 24-year-old boy, who is a graduate of Economics from the University of East London, since last year. The second one is in the same school, reading music, whose song, “Egbami” has got everybody talking. I don’t want to sit here and talk about marriage that happened 26 years ago, it is ridiculous to do that. People already know this about me, so I don’t want to talk about it anymore.
I did not walk out of it; my husband left me for someone else. There are a lot of women their husbands leave for someone else, I don’t think I am the only one. I married as an adult to a man that I saw and liked, and believed in my mind that I had seen someone I want to be with. I spent four years of my life with him and the person decided to walk out, and move on with another woman, I don’t think I should be carrying matchet pursing people for that. He found another woman and decided to move on with his life.
I can give you his number so you can ask him about it! He is in a better position to tell you why he left me. If I had walked out, I should be able to give you a reason. Now someone walked out on me, I can’t tell you why the person walked out on me. The reason I can say is that he met someone else. Any other reason, I will probably give you his number so you can ask him, because I cannot speak someone else’s mind.
Reconciling with him
I will probably have to think about it before I will give you an answer to that question because you just asked a question that I am not prepared for. I never thought about this before.That is why I don’t like saying I regret this or I regret that. They are the reason I am not angry at the marriage. How can I be angry when I have such beautiful children? I have friends and colleagues who are my age mate who are not married and have no child, and those ones are the biggest bad bele that I have; just look at me, Shan George, a package of blessings. That is why I don’t like coming out to talk, you say this, then I would come out and I say it’s a lie; no, I don’t have time for that. Ninety percent of the ‘bad beles that say Shan George is this, Shan George is that, are far below me; I look at them, all I feel for them is pity, because I am far ahead of them. I am so blessed and it is not my fault. That is why I don’t get angry at what I hear about me.
I will still remarry
I think so; I think there are still good men despite what we women say about men being this or that. I have seen a lot of men staying married to their wives and becoming good husband to their wives and good fathers to their children. So I think there are a lot of good men, out there, women should not because of what happened in a particular affair keep judging men as being all bad. If you had a relationship and it did not go down well, don’t use that to spoil the next one. So I am sure I will meet a good man out there someday.
There should be a lot waiting for your yes or no?
I have not seen a man yet, that is just the truth.
Well, I may not really be searching. I am not a 29-year-old girl or a 25-year-old girl anymore. There are things that actually put pressure on women to start searching. But I am not in that situation. I know there will be a good man someday; a good man will come around some day.